Many things happen to us daily and sometimes great people happen to us. It can be a stranger turned to an acquaintance and an acquaintance turned to a best friend and best friend turned into your world. You get the gist.
Sometimes people introduce you to your old self and they bring back a spark which you might have abandoned long back. You think about their presence and you just smile and think about it again and again. It is when you become a believer and start clutching to hope furthermore. You finally think your slumber and all the complaints you had with life came to an end. This person becomes a huge part of your life. You remember everything they say. You pick up their habits and you start behaving according their likes or dislikes. There is a sense of familiarity and danger alongside. These things intrigue us and our world starts revolving around them.
But after a point it becomes toxic, you don’t see them reciprocate with the same care and attention you used to get before from them. They take you for granted but you will stay with them out of stubbornness. In these kind of friendships, it is not an equality equation and it is more of a celebrity-fan equation. You are the “fan” and they are the “celebrity”. You neglect your personal values, your limits and you get ready to cross every line just for them.
Toxic friendships or toxic relationships do not require physical, mental or sexual abuse, it can be done simply by neglect.
You will wait for hours just to talk to them. Trust me at that time it feels worth the wait but for how long can you do that? Your world becomes so wrapped around them that you lose connect with your other friends and even your family. If you are currently facing something familiar my advice for you is to get out. They will not change and things will not go back to the way it used to be.
And then you will reach the most difficult and the most traumatic part. Unfortunately, there is nothing you can do about it. The damage that happens in this phase you cannot undo that and you cannot reduce the effect and the impact it has on you. THEY LEAVE!
They leave and this always happens, they leave without a word or after a huge fight. In most cases, they leave blaming you for being overwhelming. Those things you did for them out of care have no value. You realise that you were fighting with the whole world for nothing. Straight up N-O-T-H-I-N-G.
It was happening to me I clung to someone for four months and today the fourth month gets completed exactly. They aren’t with me today, they left but I am strong and I know this has happened to many other people. I am over it and I have gotten back to my normal self again.It is refreshing to be free from a toxic relationship.
Maybe I needed it to understand that no one in this world should mean more than me to myself.
Yes! it happened to me and I am not ashamed to admit it and if it is happening to you, sweetheart you will get over it and you owe it yourself to get over it and change for good.